Bill and Clegg's Excellent Adventures: Labour Pains

Bill: Clegg, this leadership campaign is most complicated.

Clegg: How meanest thou, dude?

Bill: Dude, just two days ago those two Miliband bros were the only guys going for the leader of that rose thing.

Clegg: Wasn't that the rose thing that thrashed you nine years ago?

Bill: Shut up, Clegg. Anyway, turns out there are like, six people going for it.

Clegg: No way.

Bill: Yes way. And one of them's a chick.

Clegg: Bevanite Ellie?

Bill: No dude, Diane Abbott. But like, the idea of a woman leading the Labour Party?

Clegg: Dude, you're like, totally forgetting Harman's in charge at the moment.

Bill: HARMAN'S A CHICK?!?

Dave: Er, sorry to interrupt chaps, but Merkel says the Euro's in danger.

Bill & Clegg: BOGUS!

PS. For the record, the MPs running are David Miliband, Ed Miliband, Ed Balls, John McDonnell, Andy Burnham, and Diane Abbott. This just got a bit more interesting, dudes...

The Evening Stanners